Today is the fifth of March. As this Sunday comes to a close I find it is hard to determine what my emotions are. Part of me feels like I have found a new kind of peace of mind because I finally know where I am going. I can finally tell people, “Yes, I am going to Germany next year.” The other part of me feels even more anxious than I was before I found out where I am going. My stomach has been twisting around for a few hours already and I almost feel noxious. I’m very excited though. I couldn’t wait to set up my blog and get to work. I couldn’t wait to see if I would hear from one of my host families or host club. For a few months now, I’ve come to appreciate the beauty of the community that I have lived in my entire life. I’ve grown to appreciate the chill of winter and spring and the sunrises and sunsets. I realize how much my friends at school mean to me. I realize how much of an impact my school’s musical programs have had on me. Despite how much I have realized I love my community, I feel like I want to travel. I just feel the urge to go somewhere and meet new people. I’m scared of leaving my home behind, but I also feel like I need to. Not because my home is bad but because I need to experience more. I think that the little time I have left in my home country is going to be spent with as many friends and family as I can and make the most memories I can.
March 6th, 2017